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Vampires Suck
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Vampires Suck
Vampires Suck is a 2010 American vampire parody film written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. Theatrically released by 20th Century Fox on August 18, 2010, it stars Jenn Proske, Matt Lanter, Christopher N. Riggi, Ken Jeong, Anneliese van der Pol, and Arielle Kebbel, and mainly parodies The Twilight Saga franchise (specifically the original film and its sequel, New Moon). Like the previous Friedberg and Seltzer movies, the film was panned by critics for its humor and plot.
Edward Sullen strips off his clothes during the St. Salvatore festival while Becca Crane rushes to stop him. While running through a fountain, she accidentally splashes water around, causing people to party in the fountain and thus stopping Becca. In a flashback, Becca relocates to the Pacific Northwestern town of Sporks to live with her clueless father Frank, the town's sheriff, after her mother, who raised her in Nevada, commences a romantic affair with Tiger Woods. Meanwhile, a killing spree is attributed to the Canadians, but the real perpetrators are a group of vampires usually mistaken for the Black Eyed Peas. Becca quickly befriends many students at her new high school, but is also intrigued by the mysterious and aloof Edward, whose odd behavior perplexes her during their biology class.
Later, when Becca is nearly struck by a van in the school parking lot, Edward stops the vehicle by thrusting another student in the van's way. After much research and thought, she confronts Edward and assumes he is one of the Jonas Brothers. Edward corrects her, saying he is a vampire but that he only consumes animal blood. Despite the danger of being around a vampire, Becca agrees to accompany Edward to the prom. Later, Becca and Edward kiss passionately in her room. Becca attempts to seduce Edward into having sex, but he abstains.
On Becca's birthday, Edward introduces her to his vampire family. While unwrapping one of her presents, Becca unintentionally suffers a paper cut. Edward's brother Jeremiah attempts to bite her, but is knocked away. To keep his family away from Becca, Edward distracts them and takes her out to the woods. He then proceeds to abrupty end their relationship, and she throws a tantrum after he leaves. Much to her expectance, Becca is attacked by three nomadic vampires, but Edward intervenes and saves her.
Becca is left heartbroken for months by Edward's departure, but she is comforted by her deepening friendship with her childhood friend Jacob White. When the nomadic vampires reencounter her in the woods, Jacob transforms into a Chihuahua as his werewolf pack arrives to save her. Meanwhile, Edward has moved to Rio de Janeiro and is now dating Lady Gaga to deal with losing Becca. His sister Iris, via her gift of prophecy, later incorrectly informs him that Becca killed herself. Edward becomes depressed and decides to provoke the "Zolturi", a powerful and narcissistic vampire coven, into killing him by exposing himself in the sunlight in front of humans, thus exposing the existence of vampires. Iris has another vision of Becca's survival as he leaves, but she is unable to warn him.
Arriving at Becca's house, Iris implores her to rescue Edward by revealing to him that she is still alive. To Becca's shock, the Zolturi are currently partying at the prom due to the St. Salvatore theme. Jacob appears and orders Becca to choose between him and Edward, but just before she announces her decision, he runs off to pursue a cat he noticed. Upon arriving at the prom, Becca is caught between the warring factions of Edward fangirls and Jacob fangirls. She is unable to reach Edward before he exposes himself, figuratively and literally. However, twilight occurs, followed by a new moon and an eclipse, concealing Edward's vampiric nature as Becca gets him to safety. Frank arrives to check on Becca, making her hopeful; however, he thinks supernatural creatures are the prom theme and leaves. After a fight between him and the Zolturi leader, Daro, Edward is forced to turn Becca into a vampire, at risk of being slaughtered. He agrees to do so only if she marries him, which she accepts.
Suddenly, the leader of Jacob's fangirls strikes Edward on the head, but he survives the blow; the girl is subsequently attacked by the newly vampirized Becca.
Vampires Suck was released on August 18, 2010, in the United States, Canada and Russia, on August 26 in Australia and on October 15 in the United Kingdom.
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Vampires Suck
Vampires Suck is a 2010 American vampire parody film written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. Theatrically released by 20th Century Fox on August 18, 2010, it stars Jenn Proske, Matt Lanter, Christopher N. Riggi, Ken Jeong, Anneliese van der Pol, and Arielle Kebbel, and mainly parodies The Twilight Saga franchise (specifically the original film and its sequel, New Moon). Like the previous Friedberg and Seltzer movies, the film was panned by critics for its humor and plot.
Edward Sullen strips off his clothes during the St. Salvatore festival while Becca Crane rushes to stop him. While running through a fountain, she accidentally splashes water around, causing people to party in the fountain and thus stopping Becca. In a flashback, Becca relocates to the Pacific Northwestern town of Sporks to live with her clueless father Frank, the town's sheriff, after her mother, who raised her in Nevada, commences a romantic affair with Tiger Woods. Meanwhile, a killing spree is attributed to the Canadians, but the real perpetrators are a group of vampires usually mistaken for the Black Eyed Peas. Becca quickly befriends many students at her new high school, but is also intrigued by the mysterious and aloof Edward, whose odd behavior perplexes her during their biology class.
Later, when Becca is nearly struck by a van in the school parking lot, Edward stops the vehicle by thrusting another student in the van's way. After much research and thought, she confronts Edward and assumes he is one of the Jonas Brothers. Edward corrects her, saying he is a vampire but that he only consumes animal blood. Despite the danger of being around a vampire, Becca agrees to accompany Edward to the prom. Later, Becca and Edward kiss passionately in her room. Becca attempts to seduce Edward into having sex, but he abstains.
On Becca's birthday, Edward introduces her to his vampire family. While unwrapping one of her presents, Becca unintentionally suffers a paper cut. Edward's brother Jeremiah attempts to bite her, but is knocked away. To keep his family away from Becca, Edward distracts them and takes her out to the woods. He then proceeds to abrupty end their relationship, and she throws a tantrum after he leaves. Much to her expectance, Becca is attacked by three nomadic vampires, but Edward intervenes and saves her.
Becca is left heartbroken for months by Edward's departure, but she is comforted by her deepening friendship with her childhood friend Jacob White. When the nomadic vampires reencounter her in the woods, Jacob transforms into a Chihuahua as his werewolf pack arrives to save her. Meanwhile, Edward has moved to Rio de Janeiro and is now dating Lady Gaga to deal with losing Becca. His sister Iris, via her gift of prophecy, later incorrectly informs him that Becca killed herself. Edward becomes depressed and decides to provoke the "Zolturi", a powerful and narcissistic vampire coven, into killing him by exposing himself in the sunlight in front of humans, thus exposing the existence of vampires. Iris has another vision of Becca's survival as he leaves, but she is unable to warn him.
Arriving at Becca's house, Iris implores her to rescue Edward by revealing to him that she is still alive. To Becca's shock, the Zolturi are currently partying at the prom due to the St. Salvatore theme. Jacob appears and orders Becca to choose between him and Edward, but just before she announces her decision, he runs off to pursue a cat he noticed. Upon arriving at the prom, Becca is caught between the warring factions of Edward fangirls and Jacob fangirls. She is unable to reach Edward before he exposes himself, figuratively and literally. However, twilight occurs, followed by a new moon and an eclipse, concealing Edward's vampiric nature as Becca gets him to safety. Frank arrives to check on Becca, making her hopeful; however, he thinks supernatural creatures are the prom theme and leaves. After a fight between him and the Zolturi leader, Daro, Edward is forced to turn Becca into a vampire, at risk of being slaughtered. He agrees to do so only if she marries him, which she accepts.
Suddenly, the leader of Jacob's fangirls strikes Edward on the head, but he survives the blow; the girl is subsequently attacked by the newly vampirized Becca.
Vampires Suck was released on August 18, 2010, in the United States, Canada and Russia, on August 26 in Australia and on October 15 in the United Kingdom.